I like to get up in the morning before my boys are awake, to spend some quiet time reading from the bible and praying. My days go so much better when I do that. They aren’t perfect, things still go wrong, but my attitude is better when those things stray from my plan. Today was not one of those days. I tried, sort of. I woke up late, didn’t even make it halfway through my reading before I was thrust into the morning routine of sippy cups, diaper changes, and hundreds of other demands. Now, at the end of the day, I can definitely tell. I failed the mommy card today. I was lazy, cranky, and impatient. I woke up irritated by people and things that my children had no control over, and I carried it with me all day.
I am so thankful for God’s unending forgiveness.
Tonight I sat on my oldest son’s little toddler bed with him, with the mattress squished thin beneath us, blankets and stuffed animals stacked around us, and apologized for my bad attitude today. I explained to him that sometimes adults act ugly and need a time out too. I said I was sorry for acting ugly today, gave him a hug and asked if he would forgive me. His response? “I fgib you. I sowwy Mommy. I go time out too…….. I love ew haiw (read: I love your hair).” When I went over to pick up my younger son to apologize and kiss the top of his head, he just laughed and snuggled his head into my shoulder. Oh the unconditional love of a child! There is so much I have learned and am learning from my boys. They will both wake up in the morning, excited to see me, completely erasing the memories of my bad attitude of today from their little minds. They won’t hold a grudge. They won’t move on, just to bring it up again in two months. They forgive and let it go. That’s definitely the lesson I needed to hear today. Remember, I woke up irritated by people and things and carried that irritation and hurt with me all day. I had told myself that morning I had forgiven….but I hadn’t.
I am so thankful for God’s unending forgiveness.
Someone once pointed out to me that moms often talk about needing “a break,” and wanting to get away from the kids to do something for themselves. However, when we do that, we usually dread that time being over and going back into our homes, kids waking up from naps, getting up in the morning, etc. When that break includes God’s Word and prayer, the results are drastically different. The next time you want to hide in the bathroom while the kids run through the house screaming, take a bible. 🙂
